BDSM

Topping From The Bottom

Something that comes up a lot in the BDSM world and very much in the chastity world is “topping from the bottom”. There are many variations on this theme but basically it means that the bottom or submissive in the scenario is calling the shots and controlling the play/scene/situation.

Imagine the scenario of a guy looking to introduce chastity to his partner.  He tells her how beneficial it will be for her and that she will be in control and so she agrees to give it a go.

Communication as to how things should proceed should then take place and things move forward with both learning and exploring the dynamic as they go on. 

Unfortunately, sometimes you find that there is a preconceived notion as to how things should progress and very often you find the male partner “suggesting” how things should proceed.  “We should have rules and if I break them I get punished”  “It’s only supposed to be …….” Etc.

This is the bottom taking control of the dynamic which is really what the “Top” or dominant partner should be doing.    Hence Topping from the bottom. 

It happens often when the submissive partner is more experienced or has done more research than the dominant. 

Please note, this is a very basic description of Topping from the Bottom.  Feel free to join the discussion on my forum Here

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